What this page covers
What does the Bible say about family: parents, children, and the relatives we are bound to care for?
Passages on parents and children, honoring and providing for relatives, and the families Scripture describes, including complicated and painful ones. It also suggests passages to read with children. The bond between spouses has its own page, Marriage.
The families in the Bible are seldom ideal. Genesis alone includes rival brothers, a household split between two mothers, and a favored son sold by his own brothers. Scripture tells these stories honestly, and it shows God at work inside them: years later Joseph tells those brothers, “you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good” (Genesis 50:20).
Parents and children
The commandment to honor father and mother (Exodus 20:12) was addressed to grown Israelites as much as to children, and it included caring for parents as they aged. Sirach makes that concrete: help your father in his old age, and be patient if his understanding fails (Sirach 3:12–14). The New Testament keeps the commandment but adds a duty running the other way: parents are not to provoke or discourage their children (Ephesians 6:1–4; Colossians 3:20–21). Deuteronomy pictures faith passed on in ordinary moments, at home and on the road (Deuteronomy 6:6–7).
A proverb, not a promise
Proverbs 22:6 says a child trained in the right way will not depart from it. Proverbs are wisdom about how life generally works, not guarantees, and many parents of faith have watched a grown child walk away. (Some interpreters also read the Hebrew as “according to his way”: training suited to each child.) The verse encourages faithful parenting; it does not assign blame.
The family Jesus grew up in
Jesus spent most of His life in a household in Nazareth, “subject to” Mary and Joseph (Luke 2:51–52). Joseph was not His father by birth, yet Mary could say to Jesus, “Your father and I were anxiously looking for You” (Luke 2:48), a detail that adoptive and blended families often notice. Catholics celebrate this household on the Feast of the Holy Family.
When family is hard
Ruth bound herself to Naomi, her mother-in-law, when neither had a husband or a home (Ruth 1:16–17). The psalms speak to those whose families have failed them: “When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up” (Psalm 27:10), and God “sets the lonely in families” (Psalm 68:5–6). Honoring parents does not require accepting abuse; if you or a child are unsafe, please reach out for help. The Forgiveness page explains why forgiving a family member is not the same as returning to harm.
Reading with children
For younger readers, start with stories rather than commands: Jesus welcoming children (Mark 10:14), Jesus growing up “in wisdom and stature” (Luke 2:52), and Ruth’s loyalty to Naomi. Reading the surrounding chapter together lets them hear the whole story.
Passages, in context
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which the Lord your God gives you.
Honora patrem tuum et matrem tuam, ut sis longævus super terram, quam Dominus Deus tuus dabit tibi.Exodus 20:12 · Clementine Vulgate
The commandment to honor father and mother. It was given to adults as well as children, and Jesus later applies it to supporting parents in their need (Mark 7:10-12).
The Ten Commandments at Sinai
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with a promise: “that it may be well with you, and you may live long on the earth.” You fathers, don’t provoke your children to wrath, but nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Filii, obedite parentibus vestris in Domino: hoc enim justum est. Honora patrem tuum, et matrem tuam, quod est mandatum primum in promissione: ut bene sit tibi, et sis longævus super terram. Et vos patres, nolite ad iracundiam provocare filios vestros: sed educate illos in disciplina et correptione Domini.ad Ephesios 6:1–4 · Clementine Vulgate
Paul speaks to children directly, as members of the church who would hear the letter read, and then limits fathers too: “don’t provoke your children to wrath.”
Paul’s instructions for Christian households
Children, obey your parents in all things, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, don’t provoke your children, so that they won’t be discouraged.
Filii, obedite parentibus per omnia: hoc enim placitum est in Domino. Patres, nolite ad indignationem provocare filios vestros, ut non pusillo animo fiant.ad Colossenses 3:20–21 · Clementine Vulgate
The same pairing in a shorter form, with a reason that every parent can recognize: fathers should not provoke their children, “so that they won’t be discouraged.”
Paul’s instructions for Christian households
These words, which I command you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise up.
Latin correspondence unavailable for this passage.
Faith handed on in ordinary moments: at home, on the road, at bedtime and in the morning.
Moses’ teaching after the great commandment to love God
Train up a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not depart from it.
Latin correspondence unavailable for this passage.
A much-loved verse for parents. Like every proverb it describes how life usually goes, not a guarantee; it is not a verdict on parents whose grown children have chosen another path.
A collection of Solomon’s proverbs
And He went down with them and came to Nazareth. He was subject to them, and His mother kept all these sayings in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.
Et descendit cum eis, et venit Nazareth: et erat subditus illis. Et mater ejus conservabat omnia verba hæc in corde suo. Et Jesus proficiebat sapientia, et ætate, et gratia apud Deum et homines.Lucas 2:51–52 · Clementine Vulgate
The Son of God grew up in an ordinary household, “subject to them,” and grew in wisdom and stature. Mary keeps what she does not yet understand in her heart.
After Mary and Joseph find the twelve-year-old Jesus in the temple
Ruth said, “Don’t urge me to leave you, and to return from following you, for where you go, I will go; and where you stay, I will stay. Your people will be my people, and your God my God. Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord do so to me, and more also, if anything but death parts you and me.”
Quæ respondit: Ne adverseris mihi ut relinquam te et abeam: quocumque enim perrexeris, pergam, et ubi morata fueris, et ego pariter morabor. Populus tuus populus meus, et Deus tuus Deus meus. Quæ te terra morientem susceperit, in ea moriar: ibique locum accipiam sepulturæ. Hæc mihi faciat Dominus, et hæc addat, si non sola mors me et te separaverit.Ruth 1:16–17 · Clementine Vulgate
A widowed daughter-in-law refuses to leave her widowed mother-in-law: family made by loyalty and choice, not only by birth.
Ruth and Naomi on the road from Moab
My son, help your father in his old age,
and don’t grieve him as long as he lives.
If he fails in understanding, have patience with him.
Don’t dishonor him in your full strength.
For the kindness to your father will not be forgotten.
Instead of sins it will be added to build you up.
Latin correspondence unavailable for this passage.
Practical counsel for adult children: help your father in old age, and if his understanding fails, be patient with him.
Ben Sira’s wisdom, a deuterocanonical book; read in Catholic churches on the Feast of the Holy Family
But if anyone doesn’t provide for his own, and especially his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Si quis autem suorum, et maxime domesticorum, curam non habet, fidem negavit, et est infideli deterior.1 ad Timotheum 5:8 · Clementine Vulgate
Providing for one’s own household is treated as part of the faith itself, not an optional extra.
Instructions on caring for widows in the church
A father of the fatherless, and a defender of the widows,
is God in His holy habitation.
God sets the lonely in families.
He brings out the prisoners with singing,
but the rebellious dwell in a sun-scorched land.
patris orphanorum, et judicis viduarum; Deus in loco sancto suo. Deus qui inhabitare facit unius moris in domo; qui educit vinctos in fortitudine, similiter eos qui exasperant, qui habitant in sepulchris.Vulgate Psalm 67:6–7 · Clementine Vulgate
God is “a father of the fatherless” who “sets the lonely in families”: Scripture’s word to anyone whose own family is absent or broken.
A psalm of praise for God’s care for the vulnerable
How this differs from related topics
Marriage covers husband and wife; this page covers the wider household. Scripture’s families are rarely tidy, and none of these passages asks anyone to accept abuse: honoring a parent does not mean staying in danger. If a child or adult is being harmed at home, contact emergency services; in the United States, the Childhelp hotline (1-800-422-4453) can help.